Uh oh.
The Internet has gone into full-blown meltdown with mobs of angry mums waving their plastic yellow forks after an article (read, rant) attacking so-called slummy mummies.
For the uninitiated, the 'slummy mummy' brigade are those mums who blog about the realities of life as a mum - sometimes serving frozen food instead of gourmet meals, how they de-stress with wine (or gin!) after the kids go to bed, or how they curse under their breath when their kids annoy them.
In a nutshell - most of us.
The issue is that some mums don't love admitting this - they like to hold onto the idea that mothers should be as pure as the tears of a unicorn. And that 'Stepford mum' image is dangerous.
It is dangerous because it is impossible and it is dishonest.
We all know someone like this who only reveals the very well-edited highlights of their life; the spotless children, the cooked-from-scratch dinners, the impeccable school results and perfect sleeping routines.
We watch these unicorn mums in half-fascination, half-horror as we scroll through their lives while hiding in the bathroom or in between refereeing the squabbles in our own loony bin.
This week a hugely-critical article appeared in a national newspaper - it labelled the most prominent 'slummy mummy' bloggers as "moaning mums", "arrogant women" and accused them of "dimwit narcissism" as well as "dishonesty."
The article questioned their parenting choices:
"Feeding their toddlers frozen fish fingers, swigging gin from baby cups and potty-mouthed ranting about their kids online: Why ARE so many women boasting they're slummy mummies?
Heaven forbid you should let slip any sign of pride, standards or pushiness. Confessing that you’ve had a good day with the children, got homework completed on time and managed to fit in a bit of piano practice would earn you instant dismissal from the club."
Wow. Harsh.
Navigating the choppy waters of Motherhood is hard. It can often be lonely, so the idea that some mums are being attacked for opening up their truths to the community of mums just seems wrong.
Blogger, Steph Douglas explained why she feels that being so honest is very relatable to other mums:
"We were able to share that we found motherhood tough and that in itself takes away a lot of the guilt and fear that you’re a terrible mother. We can help people feel less alone.That feeling of community and solidarity is really powerful, and that is why you've got best selling books that talk honestly about motherhood topping the charts."
Sarah Turner, aka the Unmumsy Mum, wrote an awesome response to the piece:
"I already knew what it would say. In fact, if I had put money on it, I would have been on the lookout for a five-point attack:
Something about being slummy. Check.
Something about swearing. Check.
Something about alcohol. Check.
Something about fish fingers. Check.
An overarching message about how mums should cherish every single moment. Check.
Sarah has two little boys and lives in Devon - she says she is proud to be a 'slummy mummy':
"You would have known that I regularly beat myself up for not cherishing every sodding second but that on balance, I have decided that sharing the good, the bad and the ugly is more important. And potty training is ugly. Fact."
I am tired of people trying to pit mums against each other - especially for being a normal mum who wants to talk about their normal lives. Who doesn't swear under their breath when their child is being annoying? Who doesn't love that moment when you can flop on the couch when the children go to bed. Fish-fingers for dinner....so sue me!
Parenting is fun and amazing, but it is really freaking hard - and it is ok not to love every minute of it.
Yes, I feel very lucky and obviously, my three children are my world - but being slightly dramatic about the realities of life as a mum is a way of dealing with the overwhelming responsibility we find ourselves with.
We are tasked with keeping these little ones safe, making them world-ready, teaching them and nurturing their emotional intelligence. And that is damn scary.
Giggling about the little things is a coping method, a way of releasing the fear that we are not doing it right or we are messing up horribly.
For someone to attack that vulnerability is not just a low-blow, it goes against everything the sisterhood of motherhood should stand for.
