Dear new mama of two, It gets easier before you even realise it. Believe me.
I’ve found that those that have been through it tend to focus on how things will get easier in the long-term. Just get through the first year, and it’ll all start to fall into place. Yes, it’s a small age gap, but you’ll so appreciate what good friends they’ll be when they’re older!
That’s all well and good, but for me – I needed to hear that things would get easier, or at least that I would get better at them, soon. Like, really soon. As in, tomorrow. Next week. In two weeks. Maybe in a month or two, max.
I needed someone to tell me that there was a light just around the corner and to reassure me that I wasn’t far off.
So, here I am, I’m here to tell you it will get easier. Next month, it will get easier. Next week, it will get easier. Tomorrow, it will get easier.
You know that thing that was really, really impossible today, or maybe yesterday? It’s going to be less impossible the next time you’re faced with it.
Without those moments of feeling totally flustered and unprepared, you won’t learn what you need to learn to tackle it next time. And you will. You’ll surprise yourself at how much easier it is next time.
Look, it might be an unexpected piece of cake. It might be a complete disaster. You might be more exhausted than you’ve ever been in your life. You might have several moments during that day where all three of you are crying while you look up to the heavens and ask, how am I supposed to do this?! You might try to leave the house with them both and then vow to never do it again.
There will be more calm moments. You’ll be able to sit back and watch them lay next to each other while your toddler giggles in delight at his baby sister batting at his face.
OK, to be honest, it doesn't really get *easier*, just different. But different in a good way. Instead of having the baby screaming for a bottle or to breastfeed while the toddler is screeching and throwing toys for your attention at the same time, you get "she's taking my toys! She bit me! she pulled my hair!" nonstop. But the good news is that you *will* adjust when your younger one is around 6 months probably, maybe before or after that depending.
But I know that for me, it was pure hell on wheels for the first 6 months (read my earlier posts), then one day when the baby was 10 months old, I noticed that it just worked and I wasn't overwhelmed any more by all of it. It is a very hard transition having two under 2, but it will get easier.