What is your relationship like with your mother-in-law? On solid ground? Or a bit too shaky for your liking?   

 

It's no secret that we can occasionally run into a few issues with our extended family when children and weddings are thrown into an already hectic mix of personalities.

 

Everyone has their own thoughts on the 'right' way to do things when it comes to both - though we're of the agreement that there's no real 'right' way, just what you think is best. 

 

With this in mind, a thread on Mumsnet is stirring up some debate after one mum posted her thoughts on her upcoming nuptials and her upset at the fact that her mother-in-law (to be) plans to wear white to the wedding.

 

"We get married in September, and yesterday MIL announced she was wearing an off-white dress for the occasion. Am I being unreasonable to be a little hurt by this I believed the etiquette of weddings was only the bride wears white?" she wrote.

 

Generally, depending on how much you go for wedding etiquette, some consider it the done 'thing' to let the bride (and only the bride) wear white as the primary colour - unless you stress ahead that you have no problem with guests doing so, that is.  

 

The mum also writes that she got on great with her mother-in-law until her son was born and the two started to clash over their respective parenting methods. 

 

"[We] always got on brilliantly until my son was born a year ago, since then she has been opinionated on every decision we make as his parents and if we ask her not to do something she will in front of us go against our wishes, with the excuse of it's what Grandmas do," she added, explaining that she feels the decision to wear right to the wedding is being deliberately done to cause upset.

 

"I am trying really hard not to take it personally and as a fingers up to me ( although this is something she would do) she always wants to be the centre of attention and will play the victim if ever we try to discuss the way she is with [our son]."

 

She asks fellow mums for their two cents wondering about wedding etiquette and whether something should be said - or not - or the peace kept.  
 

"If I am being reasonable in that it's not the done thing to do, do we say something or keep our mouths shut for the sake of keeping the peace?"

 

Mums responded in droves - almost 500 comments and counting - each stressing a different side to the dilemma. Some thought strong words should be had and others thought the peace should be kept. 

 

"She’s being very rude by expecting to wear white. Surely it’s common knowledge that you don’t wear white to a wedding? I’d be very pi**ed off if I were you! I think you should say something to her, it’s not on at all," wrote one. 

 

"She is the one who will look stupid. Nobody will mistake her for the bride. Let her dig her own hole if she really wants to," said another. 

 

"She'll make herself look like a bloody idiot. Who wears white to a wedding? Serve spaghetti at the wedding breakfast and hope she messes up her outfit."

 

What would your reaction be, mums?

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