Children who are LGBTQ face much discrimination, including, at times, even in their own home.

 

This can be especially difficult when their parents come from a religious background. These mums and dads can find it difficult to accept their child's sexual orientation in the context of their own beliefs.

 

However, one Mormon father is serving as a shining example of how parents from conservative religious backgrounds can support their children - and he even created a Facebook group to share the love.

 

Jake Abhau was 'shocked' when his son Jon first came out to him at the age of 13. 

 

 

Both he and his wife Meg are members of the Church Jesus Christ of the Latter-Day Saints, and they were concerned about how the community would treat Jon when he came out.

 

The 44-year-old asked his son to wait to tell the community he was gay, but Jon was done hiding his true self.

 

“He wanted to come out to everyone. He said, ‘This is who I am. I don’t care I am gay. God knows it'. He knew there were other people who were going through this. He wanted to be a good beacon of light to others," Jake told Today.

 

The religious community, unfortunately, shunned Jon when he came out, which motivated Jake to form a private support group on Facebook known as Dragon Dads.

 

 

The group is comprised of over 110 fathers from conservative religious backgrounds who have LGBTQ kids.

 

Dragon Dads serves as an excellent way for the fathers to be shielded from harassment but also as a forum where they can discuss their experiences as parents of queer children.

 

The duality of loving their kids and facing backlash from their respective faiths is often a topic of discussion.

 

“In my church and community, they love my kid and they didn’t seem to love that (gay) part of him. As a father that kind of tears you apart," Jake explained.

 

 

He eventually decided to leave the Mormon church because he felt his family was so unwelcome in the community. Dragon Dads provided a different kind of community for Jake that accepted his son unconditionally.

 

Jake said that he had to 'un-learn' what he'd been taught as a Mormon, including his expectations for Jon's future.

 

He was devastated when he discovered that now-18-year-old Jon wasn't allowed to take a boy to prom.

 

The Dragon Dads founder and his wife Meg also had to come to terms with the fact that they wouldn't have a daughter-in-law or see their son go through rites of passage like going on a mission with other Mormon teens.

 

 

“It’s all the things you incorrectly assume. You sort of mourn the loss of the future that you expected for your kid. So that often gets interpreted as sadness not acceptance,” he shared.

 

This acceptance is reflected in Jake's involvement in the LGBTQ community.

 

Members of Dragon Dads are becoming active allies. Some even march in Pride parades, including Jake.

 

The 44-year-old joked, “Jon thinks we are gayer than he is. That is the best thing I can probably hope for because that means he is protected from the discrimination.”

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