Kelsey Parker has opened up about life after the death of her husband Tom Parker as the one year anniversary of his death approaches.
Tom Parker, known for being a member of the boyband The Wanted, tragically passed away on March 30, 2022 following a battle with brain cancer.
Now, speaking to OK!, Kelsey has detailed the ‘hardest time’ since Tom’s passing and has revealed she developed a tic from the anxiety she is feeling as his anniversary nears.
“This is probably the hardest time since he died. Going from February into March was such a hard transition because I knew what was coming this month”.
“It’s been a year since I lost him, but it feels like yesterday. I’ve not really wanted to face this month because it’s the realisation that he’s not been here for a whole year and how much we all miss him”.
She continued, “I was just dreading this month. When I met my friend for coffee I kept clearing my throat and coughing, like a little tic. I think it’s just the anxiety of this month and the struggle. It’s like living in a s**t show”.
“I don’t want to feel like it’s s**t. But obviously it is, as it’s so difficult. Me and Tom were the ‘Positive Parkers’ and I try and see the positive in everything”.
“But honestly, I don’t feel like there is a positive in my life at the moment. It’s just awful what’s happened to us as a family”.
The mum-of-two then shared how she and her family will spend the day of his anniversary, explaining she wants to ‘celebrate’ the occasion rather than it be ‘really sad’.
“On 30 March, we’re going to walk to his bench. Tom is the man with all the benches. He has three! This is actually in a secret place that no one knows the location of, but it’s really special to me and my family. We’ll lay some flowers and just think about him”.
“The next day I’m going to do some drinks for him. I’ve invited everyone along and we’ll raise a glass to him. I’m just going to try and celebrate it because I don’t want it to be really sad, even though I’m obviously going to be feeling all the emotions over again”.
The 32-year-old went on to admit what she misses most about Tom. “My heart is hurting and it aches for him. You miss the humour, you miss the cuddles, you miss the intimacy. I just miss everything that we shared”.
“I looked back at his Instagram the other night and watched his videos that he did in lockdown. And I just miss his laugh”.