Many families struggle financially. Providing for your family can be difficult, from paying college tuition fees to forking out for that First Holy Communion celebration.
One mum has opened up about providing for her children, which has sparked a huge debate online. Taking to Mumsnet, she admitted that one of her three children was not doing well in life.
“I have three adult children all now in their twenties. I think they were all brought up with equal amounts of love, attention, practical, emotional and financial support,” she wrote.
The mum explained that her younger children are doing well in terms of work and relationships, however, her third child wasn’t doing as well.
She revealed that her eldest daughter has not had an easy life, “Sadly, we all now realise that the mental health problems that my oldest daughter has experienced since her early teens are never going to go away despite her and our best efforts.”
The mum explained that her daughter had to give up her job and relationship, “It really seems unlikely she will ever be able to support herself financially.”
She admitted that she has considered selling their family home in order to help her daughter.
“I am considering selling our family home and with the addition of some savings, buying two small flats locally, one for me and one for my daughter,” she said.
She knows her daughter could live with her but she feels like her daughter needs her independence.
“The flat I buy for her would be in her name and owned outright by her. I would also aim to help her out with day to day expenses,” she added.
The woman’s other two children are living in rented accommodation, “I don’t have any further funds to be able to help them with this.”
“Is it unfair for me to help the one that I think most needs the help or should I be trying to treat them all equally despite the different circumstances?” she asked
Fellow mums quickly responded to her question.
“Tough one but I'd treat them equally in this case. Your eldest could live with you as you say,” said one mum.
Another added. “I’m not saying don’t help, but don’t do this at the expense of your other children.
“I really wouldn't. However much it might make sense to you, it would be a slap in the face for your younger two,” one shared.
One wrote, “Treat them equally. Always. Unless you want the other two to resent you and their sister for the rest of their lives.”
What would you do if you were in this mum’s situation?