Trying to cope with the new responsibility of a baby, and everything else, is just not possible. Every new mum needs help, and the good news is there are probably quite a few things you have not thought of about getting it.
The first thing you need to realise is that most people are only too happy to help – they are waiting for you to ask though. Be specific, and ask for help with things you really need help with – whether it is going grocery shopping for you, or cooking dinner.
Next, realise that while you are your child’s mummy, you are not the only person who can feed, change and care for your child. It is okay if your partner, your mother, or a friend takes care of your child for an hour or two, while you sleep or take care of other responsibilities.
When choosing who to have around, and to ask for help, choose people you like, and who you enjoy being around. That way, you will not feel that it is a chore to have them around, even when they are helping you.
Forget about having your house perfectly clean – chances are, visitors will be more than happy to do the dishes while they are visiting. Do make sure they ring first though – there is nothing more frustrating than just getting your baby (and yourself) down for a nap when the doorbell rings. You could even create a ‘visiting time’ and let everyone know when you are free to see guests.
When people do help you, expect them not to do things the same way you do. They may not be doing them perfectly, or the way you like them done, but they are still helping – appreciate the effort.
Enlist the help of a friend or relative to host a ‘visiting party.’ Have everyone who wants to meet your new baby over to their house, for dinner or a lunch. That way, your messy house will not matter, and everyone will be satisfied that they have met the new arrival.
Do not feel bad if you fall asleep while you have visitors. In fact, if you can use the time to catch up on sleep, do it.
When people do call for a visit, and they ask whether you need anything, tell them. There is always something you need, whether it is nappies or a snack for yourself. Most people are only too happy to arrive bearing gifts. Alternatively, you could ask anyone who visits to bring a meal with them, instead of gifts. Time for cooking is something you will not have during the first few weeks, so having food in the freezer really is great.