Most experts agree that it is better to wait until after your first trimester, when there is less risk of miscarriage and your pregnancy is well established. Even better, is to wait until your tummy starts to get bigger. It is really difficult for a little child to understand that you have a baby growing inside you when there is nothing to see. Once your body starts to change though, they will be able to see what you are talking about.
Another good idea is to tell your child at the same time that you announce your pregnancy to friends and family. Preschoolers cannot keep a secret and will tell everyone the news. Also, once you have told family and friends, they will want to congratulate you and talk about the forthcoming baby, so your child will hear about it anyway.
When you experience the usual symptoms of pregnancy, such as nausea and fatigue, simply tell your child that you are very tired and are not feeling too well. Do not let them know that it is because of the baby, as they will probably resent the baby for making mommy feel tired and ill.
Choose a time when your child is totally relaxed to tell them about the new baby. They will not be able to cope very well if they are trying to deal with having to start a new preschool or perhaps not feeling too well. Bedtime is also not a good time to tell them, as they will be thinking about what you have told them for the next few hours.
In the sad event of a miscarriage, simply tell your child that the baby did not grow big enough to be born and that you are going to try to make another baby grow later on.
Start preparing your child for your pregnancy by reading books to them about babies and siblings. Let them know that they might be lucky enough to have a little brother or sister, just like their friend has. If possible, tell your child about your own experience when your mom brought your brother or sister home. Keep it positive and tell your child how great it was to have someone to play with.
Once you have told your child, watch their reaction to the news. If they seem excited, then tell her to help you to tell Grandma and Grandpa - they will love the idea of being involved with something as important as this. If they are upset by the news, then tell them that you can see that they are not happy, and offer to hold them. Let her know that it is perfectly okay to feel the way they do.
