So many made-for-TV movies duped most of us mums into thinking that the relationship we will have with our teenage daughter will be exactly that: a made-for-TV movie relationship.

Sure, there’ll be some rocky patches, we’re not completely oblivious to the pitfalls, but on the whole our baby daughter will grow into our best friend, ally and confidante.

While this will happen eventually, it does not happen the moment the clock strikes midnight on their 13th birthday.

The reality of being the mum of a teenage girl is vastly different to the expectations we have as we watch our daughter grow and blossom.

Here’s why you’re not her best friend just yet.

1. Every single time you mumble under your breath that The X Factor is nothing but a fix, your daughter hears you.

You’re basically a monster.

2. You laughed at her rendition of Let it Go and didn’t even try to hide it.

You thought she was joking. She wasn’t joking.

3. You insisted on waiting outside the youth centre until she found her friends.

What kind of person MORTIFIES someone like that?

4. You asked her if she wanted to talk about sex.

Ehm, no she doesn’t, thanks. Not now. Not ever.

5. You talked about your period problems with her assuming it would bring you two closer.

She can barely talk about her own period, let alone yours.

6. You sat in on a conversation that her and her friends were having.

She didn’t want to hurt your feelings, but that hour long silence was down to you.

7. You told her she looked beautiful.

Why would you mock her like that?

8. You offered her some extra money as a treat.

Why must you belittle the wage she gets from the Saturday job that she works so hard at?

9. You walked beside her in the local shopping centre.

Yes, it helps to be beside the person you’re speaking to, but is it really necessary?

10. You told her that you loved her.

Why did you tell her that? Now, you’ve made her question everything. Surely, that should go without saying. What did you mean? Haven’t you always loved her? Why are you talking to her at all if you never really loved her!

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