Christenings can be an awkward one - who do you invite? How much are you willing to spend?


One woman had been looking forward to attending a Christening after a rough couple of weeks. 


Her husband was even asked to be Godfather, and her children were delighted and made a card for the baby.


The mumsnet user explained that she isn't friends with the parents, but she had met them a few times as her hubby is in a team with the father. 



However, things took a rather unexpected turn when she bumped into the mother and said she was looking forward to the event, cue the awkward reaction:


"She went white then red and mumbled something about coming to church. It turns out they are taking grandparents, Godparents and siblings for lunch at posh hotel. They can’t afford to include partners," she stated in the thread. 

"DH was a bit shocked and rang his mate to clarify. He was apologetic but blamed finances. DH offered to pay but his mate felt the Godmother and siblings would then have to have things explained to them."

"DH said to me after that had he known we weren’t invited he wouldn’t have agreed to be Godparent but feels he needs to follow through now.  I know I hardly know them but am I right to be upset? My DH was really chuffed to be asked and I got emotional when he was asked. I even bought the bloody present and had it engraved!"



The dilemma received a mixed reaction from other mums.


"I’m just baffled that a couple would choose someone to be the godfather of their child, something I see as quite important when they have nothing to do with that persons family?


"I think you have a right to be upset, I don’t understand why they didn’t offer to pay for who they are playing for and say that partners were welcome but would have to pay for themselves. That would have allowed you and your partner a choice," wrote one user.


One mum said it wouldn't have impacted her emotionally, but didn't agree with the parents actions. 


"I mean I wouldn't be that upset about not going to a Christening but they've made things really awkward and embarrassing for themselves, it's not usual to have a posh meal after a christening so if they couldn't afford it I don't know why they didn't just have a buffet lunch like most people do and invite partners."




Other users said they disagreed, that cost is a factor and you should assume an invite. They also shot down the idea that her husband shouldn't attend which was suggested by other mums.


"I would not have been expected to be invited in this situation. They are not having partners because of cost, it is not like you are the only one being left out, you are not close to the parents. It would be silly of your dh to turn down being a godfather because you are not invited."


"I understand why you'd be disappointed if you'd looked forward to it, but you don't really know them so shouldn't really have assumed they'd take you for lunch. Go to the church wish them well, take the children to do something while DH goes to the lunch."


How would you feel? Do you think that the mum is right to be upset?