The importance of Date Night

Isn't it bizarre that we call a child-free night out with our partners a 'date night'? But it's important, that night that we set aside for each other and only each other, with no small people or other people invited!

 

It takes planning ahead - sometimes weeks - and lots of preparation. Out comes the wax, the fake tan, the new nail varnish and then the polishing and buffing begins! Hours of searching through the wardrobe, trying not to cry as you realise that nothing fits anymore because you are bloated and that you now hate all your clothes. And all for the person who sees you in fleecy pyjamas or ripped jeans during the rest of the week when you’re watching telly or hanging out the washing with Sudocrem on your spots.

 

Myself and Richard have been together for 15 wonderful years and have been married for the last five. I always have and always will adore him. For years, we were always out together, going to the cinema or with friends, heading off on romantic mini breaks, eating out most weekends and actually being quite romantic. And then our beautiful son Jack arrived, followed two years later by our adorable little mini-me Holly. Pause dates, romance, nights out, mini breaks, romance and proper time for each other!

 

As wonderful and amazing as having babies is, they do tend to put a stop to intimacy and romance for awhile! Nights out are replaced with nights in watching Frozen, mini breaks are replaced with trips to Mothercare, Ikea, Woodies, B&Q, Imaginosity and the local park. Dinners out have become rushed evening meals in places that serve mainly pasta or pizza and most importantly, serve them quickly. If you get a chance to sip your wine and not leave with indigestion, it’s a miracle!

 

So a ‘Date Night’ is needed and is very important. It’s probably the best time to talk and have a good decent chat and laugh together. We try to make a date once a month. It could be out for dinner or the cinema. We try and make a rule that we can’t talk about the children but I usually break it first by saying how lucky we are to have them (after a few glasses of red wine!).

 

It’s funny though, because even though Richard and I live under the same roof and sleep in the same bed, at times we are like ships passing in the night. When we do finally get a chance to sit down together during the week after Jack and Holly are in bed, we’re wrecked!

 

So we both feel the importance of being together on our own at times. I think it’s so important to remember (as hard as it is at times) that it is us first and that we are not just Mummy and Daddy; we are individual people who had a relationship together before becoming parents.

 

It’s important to stay connected. We are very family orientated and would do most things together as a foursome so there are usually small people with us. We are really enjoying our children and the fun and love they bring to our lives and weekends. They make us both so happy. I still feel fuzzy when I hear “Mummy”. We are very hands on and very attentive so wherever we are or whatever we’re doing, Jack and Holly take over.

 

But it started with myself and Richard and when our babies grow up and leave (by moving to the end of the garden as I’ll never fully let go) then it will be just us again. We are Mummy and Daddy but also Lucy and Richard.