Barbie and the joys of responsible pet ownership

I’m not normally one for paying attention during the ad breaks; that’s when I usually pop out to make a cup of tea or stretch the old legs. But given the approach of the Yuletide season, and my role as parental assistant to Mr Claus, I have, of late, been paying rapt attention to the ads. The children’s toy ads to be precise. I call it market research.

 

Kids like toilet humour - see the perennial popularity of whoopee cushions - but even so, the volume of toys related to the emissions of bodily fluids caught me by surprise.

 

There’s the toy head that oozes green goo from its nose. There’s the fun-times family game that centres round a plastic dachshund’s rapid fire poops. And then there’s Barbie.

 

I haven’t been in the market for Barbie dolls for a while now, the oldest having been there, done that, and the youngest not yet old enough to know the joys of dressing an anatomically impossible plastic figurine in ball gowns, glittery jeans and crop tops.  But the latest Barbie ad has me sitting up, round eyed, every time it dances on screen.

 

For this Barbie is accompanied by a canine. A defecating, dream dog that poos when you lift its tail. Doesn’t sound fun? Well it comes with a little shovel for many happy hours of poop scooping.

 

The magic continues with Barbie’s feline friend, the peeing cat. Not to worry, there is a litter tray with some kind of sand that can be removed and disposed of. The ad ends with the tagline: Barbie: Anything Is Possible.

 

Plastic dog poo accompanied by the words Anything Is Possible seemed to be setting the bar of what is possible depressingly low at first. Then I realized that Mattel must be training the next generation in responsible pet ownership. They must envisage a day when no pavement is dotted with dog litter and every park is safe to run in.

 

After all, anything is possible.

Daisy Wilson is a freelance writer who lives and works in West Cork. Mum to an almost-teenager and a toddler who is striding through the terrible twos with a glint in her eye, life is noisy, fun and covered in fingerprint marks.