Dear other parents... I’m sorry
Filed under: MummyBloggers
I used to be one of ‘those mums’.
You know, the ones that said things like: “Oh, your little one has a dummy? My daughter never needed one, actually.”
And I really, truthfully and most genuinely hate myself for ever uttering those judgemental, patronising words to a fellow mum-in-arms.
Who was I to judge? My whole sentiment implied that she must not be good at comforting her child if a soother was required. Utter faff.
There’s been lots of debate and banter in the parenting Internet world recently about parents hating on other parents, judging each other for all sorts of reasons.
Did you/didn’t you breastfeed? Do you/don’t you co-sleep?
The cry it out sleep training brigade vs the rock and cuddle for four hours until they sleep club.
Everyone has something to say about the so-called right way to parent.
I don’t have any answers on this, because there aren’t any.
And the reason I’m so sure of that is because when my son came along I realised that you can parent two different children the same way with very different outcomes.
This realisation dawned on me recently when I was explaining to a friend what a terrible sleeper my son is. The crux of the matter lies with the fact that (like I was as a child) he loves his soother.
We took the train to Dublin Zoo last week and realised with a blood jolting horror that we’d left the dodie behind. That couldn’t be the end of the world, now could it?
Suffice to say that there are probably people still talking about ‘that crazy family on the train with the demonic screaming child’ and I’d imagine their ears are still ringing from his desperate cries of ‘where dodie? where dodie?!’
I realised then and there that it’s okay to do whatever works for your child even if that is a world apart from what your friends do with their kids or even what you did with your others.
My daughter never took a dodie. But my son does.
Right now he needs it, I need it and the whole family needs it. It’s a sanity saver.
I swear I will never judge another parent in that way again. We’re all playing on the same team against these little monsters, we might as well help each other out.
Emma Kelly is a Belfast-based mum of two little ones, an English teacher by trade and a blogger at Amelia's Mum. Life is currently a happy juggle of nappies, toddler fun, constant dieting and the (more than) occasional glass of wine!
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