How to raise a likeable child
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MummyBloggers
We all know at least one. You know, the child whose arrival in your house or back garden makes the colour drain from your face.
Bad things happen when this child appears.
Tears are inevitable, breakages are possible, and a litany of unreasonable requests is just the start of it.
Usually, you can wave goodbye to this child before the day is out and retreat to your favourite form of stress relief, but what if the child that everybody hates to see coming is your own offspring?
Some traits that make a child difficult might be genetic, but there are ways you can boost your odds of raising a likeable child:
1. Don’t give in
Somebody a lot cleverer than I am coined the phrase: “Prepare the child for the path; not the path for the child.” Don’t be the helicopter parent hovering incessantly over your child to make sure no need goes unmet for more than five minutes. Let her figure it out for herself, and she won’t be the child who is always clamouring for attention.
2. Let/make them help
Likeable kids help, so the next time your toddler tries to wrestle the mop from you, let them have it. Sure, you’ll have to do the floor again afterward, but you’ll be laying the foundation for a well-rounded individual who collaborates well with others.
Also, get them to put stuff in the trolley when you are shopping and start them doing (age-appropriate) weekly chores before they are old enough to tell you to get stuffed.
3. Conflict Resolution
The high-maintenance kid will come running to you as soon as things don’t go their way. The best thing to do is ignore them unless things get physical, but the best way to make sure your child learns how to deal with conflict on their own is to train them from a very young age. In fact, conflict management starts in the toddler years, so start encouraging your child to see things from other people’s perspectives and find safe ways of channelling anger.
And remember, kids learn from example, so make sure you are likeable too.
Aoife O'Carroll is a separated mum living in Co Kerry with her two boys aged 17 and 14, and a girl aged 10.
