Your needs and those of your baby have to come first. This usually means private time for the two of you and your husband. The stress and fatigue from delivery will put you on edge, and the attention you and your child will get from well-wishers, friends and family may be overwhelming. Although they mean well, your extended family might be doing more harm than good by offering advice and tips in the early days. You need to set boundaries so that you have your privacy but don't make everyone else feel unappreciated.
The first thing to do is switch off your phone. Use an answering machine, both for your landline and cellular phone. When you are comfortable with your routine and rested enough to have visitors in your home, don't feel obligated to act as the perfect hostess. Instead, request assistance and get them to do chores and errands for you. This includes shopping, laundry and making meals. Purely social visits can be put on hold until your baby is a bit older and your life is not as chaotic and frantic.
If you know that some of your family members, particularly mothers, are going to be more of a hindrance than a help to you, try to put off their visits until you have your life under control. That gives you a few weeks to get used to being a mother at your own pace and to develop a strong, intimate bond with your baby. That way, any help with basic chores and childcare you get from them will be appreciated and the chances of conflict will be minimised.
Learn to communicate your needs effectively to your family members so that they know how you feel and what you expect of them. Hopefully, they will understand what you are going through and be more accommodating to your situation.
