It is a beautiful stage - you have just celebrated their first birthday and your little one is really coming into their own.

 

I found this stage fascinating because I was learning new things about my child each day. This is an age when you start to discover their true personalities and that is great fun for everyone. 

 

And then, there is bedtime...

 

In my house it went a little something like this:

 

1. Relaxing bath time that isn't AT ALL relaxing because there is now more water on the floor and all over your leggings than there is in the bath Also, what happens if a child eats bubbles? (Asking for a friend).

2. Wrestle them into their night clothes.

3. Try to read a story to your wobbler while they stuff your hair into your own mouth and laugh maniacally. Standard stuff.

4. Get your ears ripped off as she tugs your earings. 

5. Rethink EVER wearing jewellery again. 

6. Snuggle them into their sleep suit and give them a kiss. Tonight they will go down perfectly - you just KNOW it! 

7. You are back into the room circa 30 seconds later as they yell the house down. 

8. Reassure them, stick back in the soother. Curse the dummy and tip-toe out. 

9. Repeat step 8, ten times.

10. Finally! They are gone to blanket street. Congratulate yourself on a job well done. 

11. Warn your partner not to creak the stairs when they are checking on the baby.

12. Shoot them the dirtiest look ever known to man when he announces happily 'not a peep' and then slams the door loudly.

13. Repeat step 8 another 14 times. He does most as penance.

14. Finally, succumb and let her fall asleep in your arms because.....Game of Thrones finale.

15. Realise in horror that you are trapped, and the moment you put her down in her cot she will wake up instantly.

16. Crane yourself slooooooowly over the side of the cot. Try to remember your 'tuck and roll' training from Friends.

17. Pause. Breathe. You can do this.

18. Hear the stairs creak and curse silently (this is allowed).

19. Telepathically WILL your other half not to come in. 

20. Hiss at him as he opens the door. Whispered shouting is even scarier than shouting. 

21. Ask yourself why you even love him.

22. Complete craning position, slowly ease your arm out from under their sweaty little body and.....

23. She opens her eyes. You panic and hit the floor. 

24. Her eyes are closed again.

25. You start to slither out of the room, military-style.

26. Wonder why the parenting books don't run boot-camp style, baby training.

27. Tip-toe down the stairs, vaulting the creaky step. 

28. Breath again. 

29. Apologise to lovely husband. He has tea waiting and you remember that you actually do really love him.

30. Woo hoooo...Game of Thrones begins. 

31. Wake up with a start - you are both asleep on the couch and you've missed the entire show. 

32. Wipe away drool.

33. Realise how much you have missed her and sneak into her room for a peek.

34. Study those perfect cheeks and spidery eyelashes. You know this little face by heart. Stroke that sticky little forehead and kiss her velvety hand. Marvel that you made her. 

35. Spend 20 minutes discussing with lovely partner how amazing she is. You both agree - she is perfection personified. Your kind of perfect. 

36. Sleep for one hour and 15 minutes until she decides she wants a hug. Spend the night sleeping on approx. 2 inches of bed each as she star-fishes in the middle. 

37. Realise how much you are going to miss this someday. 

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