1. No homework on your birthday
Seriously, why can’t the same be applied to jobs?
2. An bhfuil cead agam dul go dtí an leithreas?
The only Irish phrase most of us can remember and something that has left us with an inexplicable need to ask permission to use toilets wherever we are...
3. Fingers on lips
Used by teachers around the country when pupils were being extra annoying and was usually followed by the threat to cancel arts and crafts or PE.
4. Learning to read thanks to Tara and Ben or Ann and Barry..
Thanks guys.
5. …and learning to spell thanks to the Letterland crew.
Can you still remember their names?
6. Oh and honing both of those skills through your New Treasury of English books.
So many blank spaces to fill in and pictures to decipher.
7. Of course, we’d never have learned Irish without the infamous Bun Go Barr…
*shudder*
8. …or known how to do our sums without Busy at Maths.
We still have nightmares.
9. Thankfully there was always lunchtime, where the kid with the best lunchbox was automatically the coolest kid you knew.
Barbie? Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? Fraggle Rock? What was your signature look?
10. The right chocolate bar…
Getting a fancy brand name bar for your small break instead a nameless own-brand version meant it was going to be a good day.
11. …and our favourite.
Of course a Penguin bar was always the best surprise because everyone would say P-P-P-Pick Up A Penguin whenever you pulled one out of your lunchbox. Major cool points.
12. …and rock bottoms.
When the teacher left everyone’s milk cartons sitting in the sun and they were warm with an unpleasant odour. Small victory for the kids whose parents were too busy being jerks to let them sign up for the milk programme.
13. But then the TV would be wheeled into the class and you knew things were looking up.
No work! And maybe a nap!
14. Or you’d be picked to deliver a message to someone.
That either meant visiting another classroom or taking a leisurely stroll to The Office.
15. Getting full marks on a spelling test was the ultimate victory.
Spelling 10-20 words right once a week – if only life was still that sweet.
16. As was persuading Mum to buy you the ultimate pen.
4-in-1 biro! I’m awesome!
17. Although there were some very important steps to complete before you reached this point.
Like learning how to do joindey-up writing.
18. But while you waited for this amazing privilege, there were plenty of other things to keep you happy.
Like being the kid with the heaviest Trocaire box after Lent.
19. Or the satisfaction you felt when someone’s elastic tie snapped.
That’s what they get for trying to snap your face with it!
20. Realising you had a coveted collection of something cool was also a big ego boost.
Pogs, stickers, Puppy In My Pockets, Beanie Babies - whatever your currency, you were making bank.
21. Extra points if you could store them in your bum bag.
Shut up, they were cool once!
22. And then there were the games you played.
Like placing a butter cup under your chin to see if you liked butter. Even though you already knew you liked butter…
23. And making a Fortune Teller/Cootie Catcher/whatever you called them.
We’re still waiting for the yacht, as well as the 105 children we were promised.
24. Or risking your life in the school yard.
Remember getting your ankles clipped with the handle of a skipping rope while playing Helicopter?
25. Class could be fun though, like when you’d be allowed to play with mála.
Which we just found out is actually called ‘marla’. Our entire lives have been a lie up until this point.
26. Or got to learn lots of song for your Communion or Confirmation.
Zacchaeus, Listen, Here I Am Lord, This is the Day, We Come to You Lord Jesus and lots more. Of course you would obviously hate your teacher when they tried to make you learn an Irish hymn. Moladh le Dia, anyone?
27. But nothing could match the feeling of appearing back from holidays with a hair wrap braid…
…and knowing you had the respect and awe of every single one of your classmates.
