TheZookeeper's Blog

There are times when I really and truly dislike my teenage daughter. There, I said it. Yes, I love her and yes, I would lay down my life for her, but sometimes I find myself struggling to actually like her. Does this make me a bad mother or simply a woman who knows how to call a spade a spade and acknowledge that at times her daughter is nothing short of hideous company? Here are just ten times in...

My 13-year-old daughter went on her first official date last Saturday evening. Despite her father’s outright horror and my initial reluctance, we finally relented and allowed Rebecca to meet a boy from her class outside of the school grounds. Under the watchful eye of her older brother who was dispatched to keep an eye on his younger sister from a nearby booth, Rebecca met with her young suitor...

Much and all as we’d like to bond with each and every fellow mum in the school yard, it’s simply not possible to get on with everybody. I consider myself relatively easygoing (although I’m sure my children would wholeheartedly disagree) and I attempt to find a common ground with the majority of people I spend time with, but let’s face it, some people and their personalities are just...

My next door neighbour recently became a mum for the first time. Aware her husband works incredibly long hours, I’ve been trying to pop in as often as I can. Last week, she opened the door to me with a haunted look in her eyes, but still beckoned me in with her usual smile. Bouncing her son on my knee, I chatted as usual and she kept up with the conversation before suddenly glancing at the...

My mother always told me I’d need eyes in the back of my head once I become a mum. While obviously I understood the phrase, I didn’t truly appreciate the sentiment until very recently. Despite having been a mother for fifteen years, I have, thankfully, endured very few scares when it comes to my children’s whereabouts. While getting lost in a supermarket or going momentarily missing during a...

I recently made the mistake of inviting my son’s friend on a family weekend away and learned in the process that I’m not quite as good with children as I thought. There’s nothing quite like spending a considerable amount of time with someone else’s child to make you thankful for your own gang, is there? Like any mum, I see my children’s flaws - and believe me, there are plenty to choose...

My friend and I once made a pact that we’d never let disputes between our children come between us and our friendship. If her child insisted mine was hogging the TV remote, we’d simply let them battle it out between themselves before intervening only as the voice of reason, not bias. If my child insisted hers was cheating during a particularly heated game of Hide and Seek, we’d allow them to...

When I became the mother of a baby girl, I spent many hours imagining the conversations we’d have as she grew up. Girlie chats about make-up, hairstyles, clothes, boys and weddings – I’d teach her so much! Or so I thought. And then she turned 13 and I realised I had nothing left to teach her. Apparently, she knew everything there was to know and my input was nothing but a dull noise in the...

I remember telling myself that once I become a mum, the little things wouldn’t faze me. In my headier younger days, I recall thinking that once I sacrificed myself to childbirth in all its messy, gooey glory I’d be able for anything. Being told I’d 'check my dignity at the door’ before my first birth must have instilled a false sense of confidence that I’d emerge someone who would be...

My seven-year-old son has recently learned that women get periods and, as a result of this, he has become increasingly concerned for the welfare of myself and his teenage sister. While I always assumed Alex would be respectful of girls and women, I didn’t quite anticipate this level of concern. I also didn’t expect he would familiarise himself so early with the workings of the female anatomy...