Skinny mum

 

The headline reads: “Kim Kardashian loses 30lbs of baby weight in 6 weeks”.

 

A picture of the ever-glamourous Kim followed, looking svelte, polished and poised to perfection. My first reaction, like so many others, was: “Wow…how did she do it?”, followed by me drooling over every inch of the photo of her and “that” derriere. But then I read the headline again: “6 weeks”. SIX WEEKS?!

 

So many celebrities are making headlines for dropping baby weight, and dropping it fast. The list is endless: Jessica Alba, Jennifer Lopez, Heidi Klum and plenty more.

 

But is this the expectation for new mums?

 

We, the magazine reading people, are so easily influenced by Planet Celebrity that I believe, sadly, this pressure is real and present for new mums everywhere. And I speak from experience.

 

I have been blessed by two beautiful children. My latest addition arrived three months ago, so the term 'post-partum' is quite fresh in my mind.

 

My post-partum weight loss experience has been quite different with both. As a teenager, I was very much a Sporty Spice and didn’t really have to worry about my weight as I was so active.

 

Once I hit my twenties and discovered boys, booze and nightclubs this all changed and the weight obsession began.

 

Being “skinny” was everything, and I worked hard at achieving this, but not always in a healthy way. Fast forward to my sensible, baby making 30’s and I had my first pregnancy. Afterwards, I was filled with despair looking at my naked self for the first time – who was this wobbly, dimpled, pudgy person in the mirror? And how fast can I make her go away?

 

My confidence was at rock bottom, and I tackled it the only way I knew how…..the drastic diet. At 6 weeks, I could have had the Kardashian headline myself – I had dropped almost 28lbs and looked fantastic. The continuous stream of compliments made me feel good, my jeans felt good, my reflection looked good, but I was exhausted. Because caring for a newborn, surviving on three hours sleep and eating next to nothing will do that to you.

 

The numbers don’t lie – my blood tests showed that I was anaemic and run down. I was miserable.

 

I am one of those who gave in to this pressure to lose baby weight fast after pregnancy. I did it because I wanted to impress my husband, fit into my size 12’s, look like what I saw on the magazines and look good amongst my friends.

 

Read that sentence one more time – was any of it actually for me? No.

 

Women need to stop looking at Kim Kardashian with envy and trying to be like her (in more ways than one) because none of us can be like her, be like Heidi or be like J-Lo. Not only do they live very different lives (think personal trainer, personal chef, round the clock nanny, personal style teams and millions to spend on top end cosmetics) they are also not you.

 

It took nine months to put this weight on, so surely it should take at least that long for it to come off? Your body has been through a nine month marathon, and is facing up to another one year endurance event containing challenges such as sleep deprivation, teething, weaning etc. The best athletes fuel their bodies, and post-partum mothers should do the same.

 

Second time around, I’ve done things differently. I’m not in as much of a rush to lose weight, and the weight that I have lost so far has been as a result of eating sensibly 80% of the time, not beating myself up when I don’t and lots of intense exercise, that I actually enjoy! I drink my wine, I eat my chocolate.

 

I actually fit into my size 12’s again albeit snugly! High waist jeans and my muffin top are now best friends. I have my goals, and I will work my mammy ass off to achieve them.

 

But most importantly, when I do work hard I am now doing it for the right reason.

 

I’m doing it for ME.

 

Trish O'Neill is a Cork based writer/blogger and author of Blarneymum. Blarneymum is aimed at parents who want to share tips and tricks about parenthood, everyday life and have a giggle along the way. When not busy blogging, Trish is busy being a mum to two adorable rascals :-)