Working mother guilt ...
Filed under:
MummyBloggers
Working mother guilt was a new phenomenon to me when I returned to work after my maternity leave with Noah . I was not sure if I was doing the right thing returning to work and felt that as a mother I should be the one raising my child , playing games with him and teaching him new words . I experienced guilt on a level that I never knew existed . I felt inadequate as a mother , an employee and a wife . I felt that I had to over compensate at work by working harder and trying to fit more work into my day so that people did not think I was slacking if I had to leave earlier . When I got home I tried to cram more activities in with my child so that I could try and some how ease my guilt at not doing enough with him and by the time I got to sit down with my husband I felt like I had to try and be upbeat and full of energy so that I was not slacking in the wife department . I constantly felt like I was juggling all the different parts of my life , terrified that at any moment one of the balls would fall and everything I had carefully put together would crack and break ( including my sanity) .
Though my working life and home life did run smoothly eventually ,the actual guilt itself never left me . Noah is a really happy , well adjusted little boy and definitely has not been affected by me not being at home everyday ! As I face back into my second return from maternity leave I have this guilt and anxiety again. Don't get me wrong I love my job and feeling the satisfaction of getting things done but I also love my children and watching them develop their personalities. I guess that trying to get an effective work life balance will always be a work in progress. I also guess that motherhood is always served with guilt of some sort. I want my children to know that you have to work hard to get what you want in life but I never want them to think I put work and a career before them. I will probably upset a few people and some may mutter about women dying for the vote ( personally I think feminism means you can think and do exactly what you want with your life ;) ) but I would stay at home with my family in a heartbeat in an ideal world .
I am trying to find ways to ease this guilt and ensure that I spend more quality time with my family and completely switch off from work and other distractions when I am with them . I think I need to just acknowledge the guilt and then move on from it .
As I say its a work in progress ;) What are your thoughts on this ?
L xx
Though my working life and home life did run smoothly eventually ,the actual guilt itself never left me . Noah is a really happy , well adjusted little boy and definitely has not been affected by me not being at home everyday ! As I face back into my second return from maternity leave I have this guilt and anxiety again. Don't get me wrong I love my job and feeling the satisfaction of getting things done but I also love my children and watching them develop their personalities. I guess that trying to get an effective work life balance will always be a work in progress. I also guess that motherhood is always served with guilt of some sort. I want my children to know that you have to work hard to get what you want in life but I never want them to think I put work and a career before them. I will probably upset a few people and some may mutter about women dying for the vote ( personally I think feminism means you can think and do exactly what you want with your life ;) ) but I would stay at home with my family in a heartbeat in an ideal world .
I am trying to find ways to ease this guilt and ensure that I spend more quality time with my family and completely switch off from work and other distractions when I am with them . I think I need to just acknowledge the guilt and then move on from it .
As I say its a work in progress ;) What are your thoughts on this ?
L xx
